I am a Mom. Finally.

Being a Mom is the greatest gift in the world. I have been told repeatedly it is thankless and it will probably feel that way as my babies need me less and my money more. But today my heart is full. I am not a sentimental soul and I am not a crier, but I know I have cried more in the last six years since Steve and I received our infertility diagnosis than in all the 24 years prior. Each time a mom would tell me how lucky I was that I could leave my house at the drop of a hat or when other women would complain to me about sleepless nights and colicky babies or when I was aware of children who were hurting due to neglectful or abusive parents; anytime someone would say something thoughtless my heart would break and my only hope was that I could find someplace private before the tears rained down and my grief forced me into the fetal position. And even though we have two gorgeous, amazing children, infertility is something I still struggle with. I yearn to have a houseful of rambunctious rapscallions. I believe there is no greater adventure in this life than being a Mom.

We began the adoption process because Steve was very concerned about me. I was a shell of the woman he had married. I was lost without children and we both knew it. When M's birth mom chose us and gave us her only daughter she breathed new life into me. And when J's birth mom chose us she gave me an opportunity to heal from wounds I felt were life ending. These women are my saviors. They wanted their children to have better lives than they were able to provide. I love them and their children. My children. My life. Adoption is a beautiful, selfless, humbling gift. Today J's adoption became final and he is now legally ours. Today my heart is full because two women made the choice to let me raise their perfect children.

I am a Mom. Finally.